The Rule of Nine is based on a set of simple daily practices that have a deep impact on shaping a child’s personality during their early years. The child is seen as a moldable being, and every action by the parents directly affects their emotional and psychological development. The theory revolves around nine essential principles:
1. Listening to the Child’s Talk
Giving full attention to the child while they speak strengthens their sense of importance. Ignoring or mocking their words weakens their self-confidence. It’s recommended to get down to their eye level, use a calm tone, and give a warm hug when welcoming them back after being apart, so they feel safe and valued within the family.
2. Daily Hugs
Physical touch and emotional warmth have a deeper impact than words. Patting on the shoulder, stroking the head, and hugging the child daily reduce their stress and give them inner peace and a stronger emotional bond with their parents.
3. Eye Contact
Looking into the child’s eyes while talking teaches respect and reduces feelings of neglect. Talking to them while distracted or without looking at them weakens the effectiveness of the message.
4. Appropriate Tone of Voice
A gentle voice is more powerful in parenting than yelling. Verbal violence distorts the child’s self-image and can lead to fearful or aggressive behavior. Choosing a calm and clear tone conveys the message without causing harm.
5. Smart Correction of Mistakes
Instead of saying “That’s wrong,” it’s better to use encouraging phrases like, “Let’s try again.” This approach keeps the child’s desire to learn alive and prevents feelings of failure or fear of punishment.
6. Special One-on-One Time
A few minutes of individual time each day between the child and their parents can make a big difference. You can play, talk, or go outside together. What matters is that the child feels they are a priority and hold a special place in their parents’ lives.
7. Listening to Their Emotions
Allowing the child to express themselves without interruption or correcting their words helps them develop honesty and communication skills. Interrupting or adding the parent’s interpretations may lead the child to lie in search of sympathy.
8. Encouraging Small Achievements
Praise should be directed at the action, not the appearance. Statements like “I’m proud of you because you tried and drew carefully” boost self-esteem more than general or exaggerated compliments.
9. Being a Good Role Model
Children learn by observing, not just by instruction; so parents’ behavior is more influential than their advice. Using polite words like “thank you,” “please,” and “sorry” automatically instills them in the child, while negative behaviors may pass on unintentionally.
Applying these nine principles daily creates a confident, emotionally stable child who is at peace with themselves and their surroundings. The strength of these steps lies in their simplicity and consistency.
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