As managers we are entrusted with
providing fair direction, counseling and evaluation for the benefit of our team
members and organization. I have found that employee performance and loyalty is
in direct proportion to the amount of respect and support given. Especially
during the most challenging times when we all tend to enter into the
"fight or flight" response.
Treating others the way you would like
to be treated yourself is a good 'rule of thumb'. Try to check all the facts
before making a response, and do it in person and in private when coaching
improvements. Self help pioneer Dale Carnegie said that when you want to give
praise, do it in writing and tell the world ... and when you want to coach an
improvement, do it verbally and in private, and may I add 'using a kind voice'.
Always try to think about how your
interaction will pave the road towards future improved relations (avoiding
blame or judgment). Remember, that we all made choices (however flawed)
believing they served us best at that time.
Assume that whatever you write, e-mail
or otherwise express will end up being heard or read by the people affected by
the message. So try to be as positive as possible with the future goals in
mind.
When deciding to be "tough"
or "kind", try to be kind. Somehow just having that intention will
produce the best results in the end. And no matter how crafty or logical our
reasoning may be, the results usually end up poorly if we try to take advantage
of another person. Even if no one finds out, the most important person already
knows and that person will suffer a reduced self-esteem. That person, of
course, is you.
When it comes to money and business,
this message can sometimes be forgotten; here is a personal story:
I am a rental property owner. Last
spring a tenant, who had signed to remain until the end of August, told me that
she wanted to move out at the end of the month for personal reasons. By the
letter of our lease agreement, I could have insisted she stay or demand payment
for the remaining 4 months. I was torn for several weeks between what seemed to
make sense from a business point of view (insist on honoring the lease terms
... fearing no one would want to rent in the summer) and what seemed like the
kind thing to do
In the end, I just did what felt right
and released her from the lease, trusting that things would work out. In
gratitude, she paid for an extra month as compensation for the early leave.
Then, just a week prior to the end of that paid month I found another tenant at
an even higher rental rate. I smile to this day knowing that somehow our best
intentions do pay "even in the business world"!
So, try to trust in what feels right
inside, especially during those challenges we all face.
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